Men have been drinking beer for eternity. Long before anything really worthwhile was invented on earth, man made beer, and life became a whole lot better as a result.

Naturally the first attempts weren’t great. Even with little to compare to, early day beer was basically swill, but like all things, progress was made, recipes were bettered, and beer become the lovely golden nectar that we all love today.

The evolution of beer

The evolution of beer is never ending though. The craft beer revolution we are currently experiencing has really taken beer from working class to working through all the classes, and has created a new identity for the beverage.

Suddenly words like palate, bouquet and colour are being linked to beer as now it is not only consumed, but also appreciated. Brewers are ‘expressing’ themselves through their products, and fancy places are popping up selling fancy beers at fancy prices.

Power to them too, but I do draw the line at one aspect that seems to have come out of this so-called beer revolution. Home brewing.

Home brewed beer is a big no no!

Home brewed beer is very much like children’s paintings. Great if they are yours, pretty much awful to anyone else.

I appreciate that some of these fabulous craft beers we speak of started in a bucket in a garage, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that from a bucket in your garage will come forth something worth stomaching.

In just about every bottle store you go into nowadays, the beer selection is marvelous here in South Africa, and by international standards rather affordable too. Why oh why then would you want to undertake the (both expensive and time consuming) process of making your own beer when a simple purchase of something proven to be brilliant is available to you?

Your Friends hate being the guinea pigs

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It’s madness. And it is not just you that suffers from the process. When your friends come over for a braai, you naturally have to tell them about your ‘home brewing’ experiment, and get them to taste your final result.

While they politely oblige, you then have to soften the blow of the below average tasting beverage by saying things like “it’s not bad for my first time” or “it was a little more difficult than I originally thought”. After eventually swallowing they then have to say something like “it’s not too bad” which then prompts you into telling them all the weird and wonderful names you have thought up for what you want to call your home brew, and how you have this kick ass logo in mind for the bottles.

Sure, there is that chance you could actually be decent at it, and make something drinkable. I have however had to taste a fair few ‘experiments’ in my time, and 95% of them didn’t make me want to ditch my overly fizzy (yet dependable) commercial beer.

Us men have better things to do with our time, beer production has pretty much been perfected, let’s look at other great things to do like sports betting, pull ups, training dogs to approach girls on our behalf or developing a good wine collection for the winter.

When we need beer, we just go to the bottle store again.

If you still want to give it a stab though, and you can sit through more than 3 mins of this video, then good luck to you.