February is the month of Valentine’s Day, so it’s a special happy time for love and romance. For a great deal of men though, it feels more like being shot in the backside with an actual arrow instead of a whimsical love arrow from cupid.
“It’s a waste of money”
“It’s an over-commercialized waste of time”
“It creates false expectations”
The negativity for Valentine’s Day is real for some out there, you only have to be on social media during the day to realize this.
Of course it is over-commercialized and all of that. But so is Christmas, Easter, anniversaries, birthdays, engagement parties… You don’t have to get caught up in the crazy stuff though.
Just do what any self-respecting man should do, and just be a little creative and embrace it for the right reasons. Then you don’t have to opt into the trap of delivering over-priced roses and soon-to-live-in-the-back-of-a-cupboard teddy bears to your beloved.
Whether you are still in the looking to hook up stage, or at the mature relationship stage, Valentine’s day can be a great excuse to just further show what a good guy you are to someone special. And who doesn’t want to do that right?
With you a little more warmed up to the occasion, here’s some further considerations to make sure you come out smelling like roses on February 14th.
She cares, she really does.
A lot of girls nowadays will say they don’t care about Valentine’s Day. Don’t believe this for a second though, because even if she doesn’t actually care too much about it, she really will when Sharon (who she doesn’t like that much at work) takes delivery of a bouquet of flowers and a cheesy teddy bear.
So even if she makes it clear that here expectations are minimal, make sure you still do something that makes her feel a little special.
Don’t be scared to be cheesy.
Never ever forget in life that if a girl likes you, it’s more because of who you are than what you do. So if you want to do some potentially cheesy stuff, go ahead, it’s what you feel is right.
Within reason of course, I mean arriving at her office and singing a Boys 2 Men song to her in front of her colleagues may be a bit much. There is latitude though for old school love letters, creative use of photos, elaborate use of rose petals and all that. The thought counts here, as its the person she cares about caring about making her feel special.
Day of showing rather than buying love.
Many guys get frustrated that they have to fork out cash on Valentine’s Day along with the usual birthday, anniversary and special holiday gifts.
Valentine’s Day is more about showing your love with actions rather than lavish gifts. Sure, if you have the cash and want to do something with it go right ahead, but focusing on the ‘us’ thing is the important thing.
Think about making a nice meal at home together, setting up an intimate movie night, doing something special around sundown. Get creative, but make sure it’s always a 2 player thing.
It’s about what you do, not what everyone else does.
Social media turns a lot of things into one big contest with everything nowadays. This is probably one of those days where you should steer clear of Twitter, Facebook and Instagram then as it is all about what you are planning on doing on the day, not what other people are projecting.
And now for the more serious side of things…
Find out where you ‘are’ as a couple.
Valentine’s Day is of course not all champagne and roses. If you look at the above and you can’t see any of this applying to you and your partner, then maybe there are some issues that you need to address.
If you dread the day as ‘you have to make an effort’, perhaps you are better off single or with someone else you would naturally make an effort for. Not a bad thing, just something you need to come to terms with. Statistically February is month that sees the most breakups, and Valentine’s Day certainly has something to do with that.
On the other hand, it is a day that can remind you just how much you care about your partner. You may have be swamped at work or dealing with other things day to day which takes you away from the romantic side of things. Valentine’s Day is just a nice reminder then to restore some balance.
Either way, reality checks are healthy and prevent you from ending up in a loveless relationship that will only make you grumpy in life.
If there is nobody in special at all in your life right now, well don’t worry, there are plenty people out there like you at this very moment. Perhaps Valentine’s Day presents the opportunity for you to meet up with them.